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I am so sorry for the pain you are going through. Now learn about how all of your doubts can be resolved through apologetics. It's an issue I just have to live with if I want to be with him, and I do, so I live with it. I am a non-Mormon who moved to Utah for college. Your crush might put a lampshade on her head and call it innocent fun. Some Mormon girls succumb to worldly laziness. Raising our children as believers is proving to be very tricky.
About two years into our marriage, I got sick of waiting in bed for him to come read scriptures with me. Oh, yeah, and this girl belongs to a verifiable cult. Do whatever it takes to at least learn from your relationship with your Mormon crush. If you do believe it fully, are you not really going to want him to make the conversion ultimately. If you shift his way, be prepared for the social costs of inactivityвplus, if you really believe the doctrine, a crisis of faith. If you both comfortable having different faiths, your relationship can still be rewarding and fulfilling. Finally, it is a very tight-knit community and despite efforts to insulate you from conversion-minded missionaries, you will be exposed to a lot of people that think, like this woman does, that atheists are without a moral compass.